Your description of your behaviour points to two possible scenarios, an exploration of submissive homosexuality, and and exploration of yourself as a girl-bear in mind these may both be true. No one sexuality or gender expression is any 'better' than any other. What is more worrying is that you obviously think it is 'wrong' to be gay. At 14 you have probably not become adult enough to know who or what you really are, and you are finding out. There is no moral question here, as long as you are harming no-one then it's all good.
People need to lighten up about what is 'wrong' and 'right'.
